Friday, May 31, 2013

The Joy of Doing Things BADLY (and What Gets in the Way)

Last night at our flat we were bored and we got a little crazy. We pulled back the furniture, plugged in the Xbox Kinnect and played some crazy sports-based games as a form of flat bonding. And it was great! So much fun!

Yet, dare I say it, it is the kind of thing I normally avoid. Just like dance, just like writing fiction. It feels too risky, it feels too much like hard work, and way out of my comfort zone. Part of the problem is I like doing things well. And these things do not come naturally to me. So more often than out I choose not to partake.

Even last night my flatmate had to coerce and drag me to give it a go. I was content to watch, and cheerlead and laugh on the sidelines, but do it myself? Oh no! However eventually I gave it a go, and I had so much fun. Of course at the beginning I felt so awkward, but slowly that awkwardness was overtaken with a sense of freedom and wild abandon, things my carefully controlled and structured self rarely feel. In that moment the freedom was just what I needed. My cares and worries melted away. I felt connected, alive, vibrant.

Lately I have been reading The Rebel Chick's Mystic Guide by Lisa Marie Selow. In her book she has this brilliant quiz that helps you identify what gets in your way from doing the things you love. She identifies four main blockages:

  • Low self-confidence or self-esteem
  • Being overly concerned about what others would think
  • Being too focussed on the other people in your life to the detriment of yourself
  • Too much socialisation and not enough hard work

When I did the quiz I came out with the first two blockages as the main things standing in my way. Not surprisingly when I look back at our flat bonding experience last night, the same two obstacles were the fears and thoughts running through my mind that almost prevented me from giving it a go.

What about you? Which blockages do you identify with? Do you remember doing something recently that felt a little crazy/risky, but ended up filling you with a deep sense of joy. Would love to know! Share below!

Featured image: 'Dancing' by 'dicktay2000' on Flickr.


  1. Michelle, I can't tell you what you comment meant on my blog, thank you for taking the time to read my post and then taking the time to comment! I loved looking through your blog! You have a great voice! I loved the post above. I often find myself paralyzed by all of the blockages listed above, mostly self-confidence and being too focused on others over myself. But I totally know what you mean when you just let go and find that the fear was truly holding you back from pure joy! Thanks for the reminder to take that leap more often! Much love!

  2. Thanks, Jenny! Your comment totally made my day! Thank you for your openness to share. xx

  3. #2 and #4 for me!

    Hehe loved reading this post - it sounds like you had fun and for that I am smiling :).

    I've recently started to do more walking in areas without defined paths, and before I used to be terrified of falling down even though I really enjoy walking in nature. Other things I have fallen in love with - getting soaked in rain and dancing and saying ridiculous things that surface in my head in front of people I used to really avoid saying them in front of.

    You are an inspiration and sweet, sweet like honey. Keep writing x

  4. Hi Mel,

    I'm glad you enjoyed reading this.

    You are an inspiration to me too - because I think you have a much more strongly developed sense of 'play' than I do. Some of the things you wrote that you have fallen in love with recently give me a deep sense of dread - haha. But I am glad that you are enjoying them - and celebrating your free-ness in the process!


  5. Hi! Thanks again for visit my site earlier. I love this post and I feel like I am kind of in this stage now too, trying stuff out of my comfort zone. What an excellent resource-I need to take that quiz!